so. my partner and I were on a buying trip to denmark and this lovely number caught our eye. raymond had to have it so we paid out our ears to have it stowed on a freighter. after waiting 5 months it finally arrived and we had it moved in to our loft. we were so excited.
later that day, raymond was having his shiatsu massage in the living room and i was reclining luxuriously on our splendid new sofa. the halfy nigger-jap masseuse finished and sat down next to me. i tried to be polite but i was very uncomfortable. it was probably the longest 20 seconds of my life. when she finally got up to leave i knew the damage had been done.
i literally dumped bottles of windex on it all night long but the smell of rotting whale carcass just got worse. she probably couldn’t see what a beautiful danish sofa she ruined though those squinty little eyelids… but it’s no excuse.
i had raymond donate the sofa to an animal hospital and call the internment camp in our area to have the woman reported.
(Studio Flømlaad - kr 39,500)
this smells like gook. i mean, look at it. slopey as a fucking ski hill full of charlies.
(Terrance Nguyen, ¥379.500)
FUCKING JIGABOOS.
(Atelier Rooten, Private Collection - Not For Sale)
This bench is about as useful as a shipping container full of Shanghai Chinks, but harder to sit on.
(Atelier du Mies, €1800)
The design concept here is lackluster to say the least. This Armoire is why white men will never have a chance with negro women. Keep eating mayonnaise and watching CBS, limpdicks.
(Oona Bannon, $4400)
My wife and I used to love this piece. We bought it on a vacation in france from a very credible dealer. Then we hosted a little soiree up in our loft and one of our guests tells us it was designed by a gook. We put it out on the curb the next morning and bleached the whole house.
(Studio Vertijet, £ 1900)
This Bed is Designed for the future. A future with fewer camel-fucking arabs.
(Hesselgren, €1950)
This lovely, natural looking pair is good enough for a bunch of Indians. They already got Oklahoma, how much do you really need anyway.
(Rolland Studios: Desk $1490, Chair $430)
this sofa by Nosigner. i guess japs need a cute place to put their coffee. i say, go back to china.
(¥ 200.000 Beige or Taupe)
Nothing says class like an operating room white ottoman. I loved this piece until I had to throw it out after a mexican put his feet on it. I’m not running a lettuce farm here.
(Axis: $397)
